For those of you who felt enlightened by the helpful visual instructions for baby care, please enjoy:

How to work at your office.

How to shop at the mall.

I am not dead. I am also not here. (Wherever 'here' is for you, I feel confident in saying that I'm not there.) I am, instead, somewhere else, probably consuming a beverage involving tequila.

Some thoughts on mayors, movies, magistrates, and mexicanos upon my return.

*raises glass to you*

The next person who uses the sentence "You never get a second chance to make a first impression" in a serious business communication will be forced to dance the Macrena naked on top of the Space Needle while holding up a sign saying "MAKING AN IMPRESSION."

Kind regards,

WoS